To be a Mother

I'm not sure if anyone can truly understand the sacrifices made by their mothers for them.  So much is given up and put aside for the furthering of their children.  As a mother of two now, I am coming to realize all the many many things that I know my mother did for me and gave up for me and learning what I must give up now for my boys.  There are big sacrifices, like giving up dreams that you may have had but are now tucked away.  There are small sacrifices that you give up everyday just to make theirs better.  And it's worth it.  During this season of our Savior and a time of thanksgiving I want to say thank you.  Thank you to the mothers who give up everything, and nothing.  Because what we do give up, is overshadowed one-million fold by seeing our little ones grow up.  And hopefully grow up to be better than we were.  I also want to give a personal thank you to my own mother.  Who gave up so much for me.  Who stayed up late at night helping me with procrastinated school projects, dealing with silly drama issues at school, or just chatting.

  To be a mother is so much more than the world sees it as these days.  We have to be a little bit of everything. A nurse, a protector, a teacher, a counselor, a house keeper, an example, a comforter and more.  One of the greatest of my blessings is being a mother.  It's the most difficult, trying, exhausting job I have.  But it's the best job.  :)

Bryan Robert Guy

Well the Lord saw fit to bless our family with another little angel.  I had Bryan Robert Guy at 7:56am on Sunday morning on the 18th of September at the TMC.  We are both doing well and while the labor was about 15 hours...they were worth it.  Bryan is so sweet and smiles a lot in his sleep.  Sam (our other little man) is so sweet with him and gives his little brother lots of little pats and kisses on the head.  It's an exhausting thing to be a mother, but having my two sweet boys in my arms makes all the exhaustion and sacrifice worth it.  I'm getting anxious to get back in to some sort of routine and tame my messy house.  We are still moving in and there seems to be stuff everywhere, even with all the unpacking I've already done.  It's driving me nuts but my main focus right now is recovery and my little men.  One thing for sure, Heavenly Father has been with me and giving me the strength I need to handle all these crazy changes.  He has sent me so many amazing people in my life that have been a wonderful support system.  I'm so grateful for them all.

Brother cuddles :)

One step at a time

My sweetheart has returned home!!! It has been so wonderful to have him back and to be back together as a family,
 

Well, any ideas of returning to normalcy or a routine when we all got home have gone out the window. We found out that we got a place on base. But after we agreed to take the house and put in our 30 day notice at the apartment they called us back and pushed back our move in date. Now we only have a couple of days to move everything and get everything cleaned out. Normally it wouldn't stress me out as much...but as I am now 33 weeks pregnant and getting bigger every day, the thought of rushing to move everything is slightly overwhelming at this moment. The base did offer to pay for our move, which is amazing. But instead of waiting to buy things for the new place when we get there, we have been stock piling everything in our apartment for the extra weight. I feel like I'm living a moving war zone right now. Poor little Sam barely has a room right now because we have stacked most of the bags and boxes in his room.

On top of all the moving drama, my sister-in-law is getting married next week. Which I am sooo excited and happy for her. The drive up there, which is about 15 hours (not counting gas breaks and bathroom stops) is something I'm not looking forward to. Number one because I'm pregnant and just thinking about that many hours in a car makes me achy and number two because we have a 1 year old and I know he doesn't like being stuck in his car seat for more than a couple of hours. Usually I love taking road trips, but the current circumstances are crushing my enthusiasm.

My second little man is due the 19th of September. Then there will be two. Sam is a good boy, but he is definitely a hand full. I know many of other moms have gone before me and had kids close together, but it still seems like a very daunting task. I feel like I change a ton of diapers now... I am so blessed to have Sam and Bryan (new baby name) in my life and I know it will be worth it. I'm just worried on how I'm going to handle all the crazy. And I know my sweetheart will be here to help me, which is a great relief to me. 

I know I'm getting ahead of myself and worrying about things I cannot change. As usual, things will work out how they are supposed to. I just need to do better at focusing on the here and now with "doing what I can, with what i have, right where I am." I pray Heavenly Father will give me the strength to make it through the next couple of crazy months.
 

Standing Strong

I think to be a military spouse...you have to be made of tougher stuff.  Because watching the one you love walk away to the airport, knowing that you will not see them for months, is so very hard.  Even harder to handle is my aching heart and trying to keep it in check to be able to take care of my little angel.  He can't understand why dad doesn't come home at night.  He doesn't know why dad isn't there to play with and cuddle him.  Sometimes I feel so inadequate to be doing this.  I want to be what my little man needs...but I can't be everything....I will give him everything I have.  I pray that my hundreds of silent prayers will be felt by my love so very far away.  I miss him so much.  It is a very lonely bed without him.  It's hard to be without my husband, best friend, and wonderful father to our little Sam.  Friends and family have been amazing in supporting me and Sam.  Music has done wonders to calm my soul.  And every step of the way, Heavenly Father has been here patiently waiting for me to let down my walls, to let out the hurt, and let Him help me.  These next months will have lots of opportunities for growth...I pray I have the courage to face them head on and overcome.